Insecurity or naivety?

I ran into old male friends in Samoa one day. It was good seeing them and then we sort of planned to meet again the following week for lunch or drinks or something. I suggested we all bring our partners and two of them shook their heads and said 'no partners'. Typical I thought. A few days later I ran into one of the guys at a shop as he was hopping out of his car and his wife was inside so I waved and I said 'hi' and this guy mate just sort of nodded at me; 'nodded' at me, yep the one that was so vocal about meeting up again that week. I waved at his wife too and said hi(I knew her as well) and I continued into the store to do my shopping. I ran into 'my mate' in the shop aisles and he was the same guy I met the week before. All chatty and cool "Hey what's up? what did you get up to after we ran into you... blah blah. We chatted for a bit then I went on my way but I was left gob-smacked.
What the hell is going on here? Is he so afraid of his wife that he won't be seen by her talking to other women...even old mates? Is the wife the insanely jealous type that he won't even risk getting in a fight? Why is this f*%^ed up attitude so common in Samoa? So I thought it more peaceful not to see these 'guys' under any circumstances without their "good" ladies around. Pity as they're awesome guys but no thanks if they have to pretend in front of their bosses. ma'imau le kaimi

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